Whatever, Clear Channel Spokesperson

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Recently, a billboard near downtown with a blonde Jesus on it proclaimed “King of Jews. King of Beers.” Obviously, a joke. Someone had hijacked the board for hijinks – or shenanigans if you prefer.

Anyway, the Chron did a follow-up on it saying how the phrase on the billboard has become a popular internet term, although it has yet to appear in the Urban Dictionary and we all know that all things net are in there. Duh! What was my point? Oh, right.

In the story, Clear Channel, the satan-owned company that sells ads on the billboard, cast a wary glance towards New Jersey artist Ron English, who was in town at the time promoting a show – the same artist known for defacing bulletin boards in the same way (over 1000 he claims). English denied it and said it was probably the work of someone who knew his handiwork because the fines are too stiff in Texas for him to risk it. I hear Clear Channel has been tinkering with the DNA of Judge Roy Bean to attempt a clone for the hangin’ judge for just this purpose.

Finally, why I wrote this stupid post. The spokesperson for Satan Clear Channel Outdoor, Lee Vela, said the following…

“We’re not accusing him. But he has a Web site called ‘Illegal Billboards.’ I mean, hello.”

And, yes, the Chron did actually italicize the word “hello.” As far as I know, the AP Stylebook states that if anyone uses the word “hello” to emphasize a statement in a way that sounds like a hairdresser, italics or single quotation marks are required. Of course, the New York Times Manual of Style and Usage claims no identifying markers are necessary, but we all know those yuppie liberal elites wouldn’t know the lingo of a pre-teen girl if it came up and hit them in the face with a bubblegum flavored lip gloss.

I think the Chron was right to choose italics. Much classier.

Good luck, Clear Channel. I hope you find the “real” culprit. You go, grrrrl. Holla!

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