The Dysfunctional Family Letter Generator

Let the hours of fun and frivolity commence.  It’s like Mad Libs for crazy people!  Here’s my first try:

Dear Asshole,

I just wanted to let you know that you have completely screwed my life. If you knew shit from shinola you would be dangerous. I have had shock therapy to try to forget your existence because you have manipulated me one too many times. I have always looked the other way, which makes me almost as dumb as you.

This time you have alienated everyone.

I have never shirked my responsibility to tell you that you are sucking the life out of me. You would be so much better off if you would just lay off of the week long benders. You must be emotionally immature. You are EVIL! It is time for you to stop screwing up your life. Let this also serve as notice that all future visits have been cancelled as I would rather claw out my eyes than see you.

Drop dead you total psycho,

You Know Who

PS: Please do not reply back, the subject is CLOSED. I need time to find a new therapist.

Weee!