It’s NOT Free Damnit!

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Those of you who read my blog regularly (yes, BOTH of you!) know that I really don’t care for lack of truth in advertising. I don’t like it when advertisers pander to people watching/listening/reading and I really don’t like it when they say things to grab my interest that aren’t actually true.

Case in point – Free Credit Report dot com. I’d rather not get a crappy cease and desist letter, so I’ll spell it out.

I heard an ad on the radio today for this place and the woman wants to tell us all a secret. She even advises those not interested to go listen to a station that plays all love songs all the time – I’m sure 610 AM loved that portion of the ad.

She then proceeded to tell me in hushed tones that knowing your credit could really help you in improving said credit and that you could get your credit report free from this site.

Well, halle-freakin-lujah! I had no idea that this ad running 100 times every hour talking about credit reports could actually get my CREDIT REPORT FOR ME! I’m saved.

So, the secret really wasn’t a secret, just some stupid advertising trick to get you listening. But, you wanna know the real secret. Here, come closer and I’ll whisper it to you…

IT ISN’T FREE!!!

That’s right, Eunice. If you want a credit report, oh sure, they’ll give you yours IF, and this is a big freaking IF, you enroll in their Triple Advantage Credit Monitoring program. WTF?

This is the disclaimer:

When you order your free report here, you will begin your free trial membership in *****. If you don’t cancel your membership within the 30-day trial period, you will be billed $12.95 for each month that you continue your membership. If you are not satisfied, you can cancel at any time to discontinue the membership and stop the monthly billing; however, you will not be eligible for a pro-rated refund of your current month’s paid membership fee.

So, you have to pay the money FIRST and then you can cancel your membership to get it back. Why do I get the feeling it is like pulling teeth just to get your money back or to cancel your service?

This is the kind of thing that bugs me because it’s such bullshit. Just tell the truth. “We’ll give you your credit report at no charge when you enroll in our program.” If your program is so good, sell me on it and I’ll listen. Otherwise, shut the hell up and let me get back to Jim Rome.

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