World Cup Gone X Rated

What has happened to our sports? I understand that we all giggle when football announcers say things like “he needs to get deep penetration into their backfield” or golf commentators say “he’s lost a lot of balls in the deep rough” or baseball guys describe their recent visits to prostitutes, but what is going on at the World Cup sickens… Read more →

Greeting Cards Getting Too Specific

My mom and I have a unique way of celebrating our mutual birthdays and Mother’s Day. Her birthday is May 1. My birthday is May 7 (Yes, you forgot it and I’ve deleted you from my Evite list as a result, so no more cat birthdays or cartoon marathon parties for you, sucka!). Mother’s Day is usually right in between… Read more →

Dear Abby: She’s Back, Baby and by “Baby” I’m Speaking in Slang and Don’t Mean an Actual Infant, Which Would Be Weird

There’s nothing quite as hot interesting as a good Dear Abby letter. Call me old fashioned. Call me silly. Call me Dr. Awesome (trademark pending). Whatever the case may be, I dig Abs and her homespun wisdom. It’s been a while since I had my own installment, so I thought I’d answer a couple of her letters myself. How hard… Read more →