A Case of Compound Stupidity

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There’s dumb and then there’s WTF? dumb.  This is even beyond that.

McMINNVILLE, Tenn. (AP) — A married woman stole items worth tens of thousands of dollars in a string of burglaries to make her boyfriend think she had a high-paying job, authorities said.

Nickey Davidson, 25, is charged with three counts of aggravated burglary and theft in a series of house burglaries that seem to have been used to finance a double life.

“She told her boyfriend in Coffee County that she had a high-paying job, so all these crimes were committed in trying to keep up with the lie she told him,” Warren County Sheriff’s Department Capt. Tommy Myers said.

“When we told her boyfriend about what had happened, he was shocked. He was even more shocked to find out she is still married,” he said.

Um, yeah, ya think?  Ok, she’s married and a burglar.  She’s a keeper!  And what guy actually needs a woman to show off her wealth in order to make him want her more…well, besides a gigalo?

The irony is that, as a thief, she was fairly clever…

Myers said the thefts involved items that would not immediately be detected as missing, such as checks from the back of a checkbook or guns from a large collection.

In the last burglary, $15,000 worth of jewelry was stolen from a home, though thousands of dollars worth of jewelry sitting in plain sight was left behind.

Give the crazy chick credit.  She understands that leaving stuff behind makes it less likely you’ll be detected.  Either that or she stole out of necessity.  Maybe her calendar looked like this:

Tuesday: Case houses on Elm Street and Mockingbird Lane.
Wednesday: Break in house on Elm Street for jewelry for Friday!
Thursday: Break in house on Mockingbird Lane for sweet little black dress.
Friday: Meet boyfriend for party.

Of course, she would manage to pick Freddy Kruger’s house and the house where the Munsters live, but she is stupid.

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