Obama the Bodyguard
Just arm him and let him go to work. You feel lucky, Al Qaeda? Well, do ya?
Obama the Ninja
Now, why didn’t I think of this? Just skip on the secret service and just train Obama as a ninja. He would deal out his agenda with swift and deadly retribution.
Obama the Jedi
You think anyone is going to fuck with Obama with a light saber? Oh, HELL, no! Plus, that Jedi mind control could help him out with congress.